Welcome to my April mood board. (AKA the mess inside my head!š) The last couple of weeks in March and beginning of April had me a little introspective to say the least. I was in my feels in a major way. Trapped in my own mind. We’re all guilty of overthinking from time to time, but my problem is that I will overthink literally everything in my mind; present-day issues, things that happened 15 years ago, and things that haven’t even happened yet. We all know the saying “no amount of stress will change the situation or the outcome,” and although extremely true, it doesn’t always help you turn your brain off.
In all honesty, sometimes I find you need to just give in. On a day that I was lucky enough to have my mom watch Harper for a few hours, I did just that. I gave in and forced myself to shut down. With thoughts nagging me, I closed my eyes for a few minutes, blasted my favorite David Bowie songs and mentally relived the times I saw him in concert. Each was memorable in their own way. More often than not, these memories provide a comfort zone. Even if some of those days and nights didn’t go as planned, (the night of the purple sky and thunderstorm complete with total downpour at an outdoor venueāask any Long Islander how fun it is to run through the Jones Beach parking lot after a show ending early due to torrential rain), it doesn’t make them any less special or important in my life. Truth is, that night particular night was one of my favorites in my entire life so far.
The thing is, sometimes there’s a mess in your mind. Sometimes you’re trapped in there and you just can’t seem to get out. Once in a while we need to force ourselves out; but just as importantly, we also need to give in here and there and embrace the chaotic thoughts and explore those caverns of suppressed memories and “what if” scenarios of the future. You can write it all down; you can unplug; you can listen to a podcast or your favorite playlist; you can also completely avoid itābut I promise, it’ll feel way better if you don’t. You’ll realize stressing over any situationācurrent, past or futureāisn’t going to do you any good. You can write your list of pros and cons for the future. You can journal your feelings of the past. You can reach out to someone who may be impacting a present-day situation you’re experiencing. Sometimes the rain messes up our plans of what we think will be a perfect night. And sometimes much like my seeing David Bowie at Jones Beach when the forecast called for nothing but sunshine, the rain actually is what helps to make it a perfect night. After all, doesn’t the old saying really say it all? “April showers bring May flowers.” Always be blooming, my loves.
As always, if you want to see the making of this mood board, you can watch it here!